Pop music Icons.

I was born in the 1970's but even as a little girl growing up in the 80's I listened to music constantly and by the age of 4 I wanted to be involved in playing music somehow. Now, by this time my family and I were living in the South-East, in Chesham, Buckinghamshire, and my nursery school didn't have the facilities to offer me that opportunity so I had to wait until my mum, brother & I moved to our own home (we had been living with our Grandparents) across the county border in Hertfordshire, to a new school and in fact had the chance to join a church choir some 16 months later, aged nearly 6, and even then I was only allowed to do practices and the Sunday morning service.
It wasn't until I was 7 that I was given the space to partake in the full life of the choir, join in with weddings, evensong and all the Christmas, Easter & the whole joy of music involved in the chorister's world. Shortly after this I began Guitar lessons and soon after this Violin lessons too. and by the age of 16 I had learned 7 different musical instruments.

Meantime the 80's music scene was filled with individuals & bands I can only describe now, as Icons. Names I now look back at with wonder & remember fondly & sing along with, remembering the words of the huge tracks that they released during my childhood. Bands such as Mr Mister & tracks like "Broken Wings" http://youtu.be/aWyeVfuolT4, or Bonnie Tyler "Hero" http://youtu.be/7f_HsjpSVaI and The Bangle "Walk Like an Egyptian" http://youtu.be/BWP-AsG5DRk, as just a very small selection. I bet you could add so many many more!!

As I reached my teenage years, I began to have the chance to buy my first singles & albums (on tape - Freiheit "Keeping the Dream alive http://youtu.be/w9aYrHzEW-w" Michael Jackson Black or White)
and eventually I even owned my own tape player & Walkman. This last piece of kit was a Christmas present and was a Sony Walkman & must have cost my mum a lot of money so I treasured it greatly. But it allowed me to listen to the music of those bands of the 80's & 90's I now feel influenced my early exposure to music as well as my continued love of it.

It's hard not to become disheartened...

As most of you will know I have been looking for work for some weeks (and YES, I realise that compared to many many others this is nothing) and in that time have made several hundred applications for jobs as far away from home as Surrey, Milton Keynes, and Oxford as well as everything & anything I could find close to home.

My outbox is full of the emails I have sent in application for posts but (maybe not surprisingly to those of you who have been through this situation) my inbox is fairly sparsely populated with responses - either of acknowledgement or with a resulting interview appointment/rejection etc.

Now I also realise that in most cases there is one person responding to these job applications & that they will almost definitely be overwhelmed by the number of interested candidates, but with email systems nowadays it is no great deal to set up a responder to such applications, so that people sending in their CV's etc know that they HAVE actually arrived at their destination, and not disappeared into the www somewhere. It would also allow those needing to keep a record of their application history (whilst claiming unemployment benefits say) to prove to the relevant people that they were indeed making the effort & not just saying that they had sent off their details for a job and not had a reply.

I have now been for interview twice in the last month for completely different roles - neither of which have resulted in any positive outcome. Obviously I haven't been lucky enough (and yes I do believe that luck plays a big part in this process - how else could you explain some of the things I've seen?) to be given the role I was interviewed for, but neither was I able to gain any insight into why I was felt unsuitable for the role. In the first case the employer I went to see are now ignoring my emails & calls after initially stating that they would "put some thoughts together" The second interview for which I only got the rejection this morning, have said that "they found a candidate with a better profile" ... but would be no more specific than that.

I have spent a lot of time applying for, pretty much, anything I felt I was capable of, which realistically is quite a lot considering my skills are widely transferable (and no I'm not blowing my own horn, this is what other people have said about me!) but I am now really concerned that considering the amount of competition for jobs, if I narrow my search down to jobs which people genuinely felt fit my skillset then maybe I wouldn't be wasting my own time, that of the people to whom I'm applying & reducing the competition a little, helping someone else maybe?

On the other hand, if I was to restrict the number of jobs applications I sent out would I be cutting off my nose to spite my face?

I'm now more than just a little bit confused... and more than a little disheartened by the whole thing.

Look I know its hard to be a mum but when did you loose your brain?

A couple of days ago I was on a bus bringing my youngest home from school (the last of my 8 buses a day routine) when a couple of stops later I noticed two young women with prams waiting to get on.

Now, at the stop my daughter and I had boarded the bus, a woman with serious walking difficulties & her son had also got on, and taken a seat at the front of the vehicle, along with her walking frame - using one of the two spaces which can also be used by prams/pushchairs. This meant the room left for such users was now reduced to either a single pram (ie one which was lying back) or a couple of pushchairs (strollers) which take up a bit less space.

The two women got to the bus, the first took up the empty area, and used it up obviously, then the second got on and stood in the aisle, looking at the lady with her son, until they obviously felt so uncomfortable with this that they felt forced to move very slowly & painfully much further down the bus!!
I was livid!!!

What on earth gave that young lady the right to expect this less-able woman to give up the seat she needed close to the exit, just because they couldn't be bothered to wait just 15 minutes longer for the next one?

I'm not unfeeling.

I have personal experience of the difficulty of using public transport with young children, and all the paraphernalia which accompanies them. I have four children & at one point my three eldest children were all under 4 years old, but I also know (again through my own personal experience as well as through living with someone who has disabilities) that getting around on buses, trains etc. when you ARE less able bodied is a near impossibility unless other people show care, respect & thoughtfulness - something which seems to be lacking in some younger people, including parents, nowadays. I would very often collapse my pram/pushchair in order to allow a wheelchair user access to the dedicated space on the bus I was travelling on if required because of the infrequency of such buses on some of the routes in our town. If there was a mum with a younger child & I was already using the space, again I would take which ever one of my children was in the pushchair out, and fold it, allowing them the use of the space - it is far more practical to sit with a youngster of 12 or 18 months old on your lap, than a tiny baby of a few weeks or even 6 months old.

What I also can't understand is the complete disdain shown on the faces of people when they are asked if they would mind moving to allow someone to share the space they are in or give it up. Would they prefer the new arrival to just barge in? Or are they so arrogant that they feel they own the air they breathe, the seat they are sitting on, the space they occupy?

Any way to end this discussion on the brainlessness of mothers....

When we gave birth we introduced a new life into a world which is hard enough already without our bad examples. Surely it is our duty to show our children the the ways in which to live with everyone around us. How to show respect to all those who share our world is one of the simplest lessons we should impart to our offspring - is it so hard to include this in the daily actions we do ourselves along with teaching our children to read, write, put on their shoes, and feed themselves.

Where is life taking you?

When was the first time you stopped and thought about where your life was taking you?

I am only 35, but I have experienced much more in those 35 years then many people of my generation have, as not only have I been married for over 17 of those years, I have 4 children (ranging in age from 16 down to 7) but I have also travelled across the US, in Europe, the UK, sung competitively as a Soprano (here and overseas) and suffered from poor health which was potentially life threatening.

All this has put many things in perspective at several points, but most recently my family's existence has once more been affected and forced to change, by my other half's heart attack and seizures, which have obviously caused a great deal of concern and re-arranging of our daily routine to cope with the changes placed upon us.

Whilst for my children the most blatant signs of these changes have been the lack of their fathers presence at times (most especially whilst he was in hospital but generally when he attends appointments or needs to rest) and the need for a carer to assist with his personal help in the morning. In my case, it has been the regular to-ing and fro-ing to the hospital to visit him, along with co-ordinating his care with the huge team of medical and other care professionals in order to ensure that Andy has the organised care plan he needs (so far this has not happened due to the complexity of the situation)

As for Andy, I can only answer from an outside point of view, but I imagine that he feels somewhat that his life has been changed to the point where he no longer feels in control anymore, being totally at the mercy of medication, doctors & hospitals. Not something you hope for aged only 41.

What, you might ask, does this have to do with my opening question?

Well, I'm sure that Andy fairly frequently wonders where his life is leading him... and I know I do.

And I have talked about my concerns regarding this topic on a previous blog article before, but more in the context of work, and what I had hoped my career prospects were, so I needed to put things a little bit back in perspective considering everything which has now occurred.

I am desperate to return to work, for two reasons 1 – for my sanity & 2 – to bring some financial security back to my family, but life is about making sure you don't loose your family or your health and can look forward to a future which sees you moving forwards with your sanity intact.

Even if this means reconsidering and changing its direction regularly.

British and proud of it.

This year as most you will remember, we completed the 2011 census. Alongside this the BBC have been running a series based on the concept of the Mixed Race heritage within British culture, which has developed over the past 100 years or so (Mixed Britannia -Here).
I have brought my children up (hopefully) to respect people no matter what race, colour or faith (or lack of) they are, so felt comfortable watching the programme in order to gain an understanding of just how mixed race relationships have changed society.
I was absolutely amazed to find out just how long ago our society had begun to merge and blend with the cultures coming in as a result of our Empire. Not just this, but with Britain being somewhere that was on the tourist trail, plenty of visitors arriving at our ports and exploring the country to meet the people who had probably never seen exotic, exciting appearing individuals such as those from overseas.

I have to admit having little experience of mixed cultural influences myself, being of white English background,   and growing up in the Home Counties during the 70's & 80's did very little to change this either.
But I would like to hope that my children will change this, that they will, through their own, more balanced, multi-cultural social networks be introduced to people who will become friends & maybe even more than this....
By exploring the huge world of experience available to them through the people now living in our local communities, let alone as my four children begin to start spreading their wings and travel around outside of their "home environment" I genuinely believe that they will learn to be more varied, flexible & understanding individuals, thus becoming generally less insular and this can only be beneficial I feel.

Surely, this it what it means to be British? -  Multicultural & Proud of it!